You know those days (weeks, months) when you’re bogged down with everyone else’s needs and wants? When you’re fixing a million meals and washing your kids’ mountains of clothes and dealing with their emotional meltdowns, wondering, what have I done? Why did I decide to embark on this family thing? It sucks.

I have the antidote. Assuming you’re lucky enough to have owned some video recording device over the past several years, that is.

Put in some home movies, sit down and really watch them.

Recently I’ve had a bit of a bad attitude about parenting. Or, I should say that daily I flip-flop multiple times between contented appreciation and grumbling dissatisfaction.

One day recently, however, Milo and Belle found an old DVD they wanted to watch. Of themselves. They popped it in and I stopped what I was doing (undoubtedly picking socks off the floor or folding something), mesmerized.

There were Milo and Belle, three years younger, with chubbier cheeks and warbly voices and earnest little faces. Watching it all unfurl on TV, I could stand back and see, actually see my children. It turns out that they weren’t, in fact, trying to make my life miserable. They weren’t whining and clinging because they hated me and wanted me to suffer. They were whining and clinging because they were one and three. Because they were sad or tired or feeling ignored.

And there I was, too. An exhausted mom of toddlers, coming across as a little glum. My smiles were small and tired. I could be heard laughing here and there, but they were hollow peals of laughter. I thought, that looks hard. That woman on the TV seems overwhelmed. Why couldn’t I have cut myself more of a break? Why did I think I had to be in constant motion: cooking, cleaning, bustling kids around?

That, my friends, is the miracle of video. Perspective.

If you haven’t lately dusted off the old DVDs or VHS cassettes of you and your children in earlier days, do so. It’s guaranteed to improve your outlook and restore your gratitude.