Ratatouille

My husband bought Ratatouille about a year ago, while on an uncharacteristic buying binge. Ratatouille? I thought. Huh. Okay. I guess it’s Pixar, so it has to be decent.

After owning it for about six months, we finally found time to slide it into the DVD player. We were…underwhelmed, to say the least.

The animation, of course, was resplendent. From the tiniest gestures to the grandest landscapes, both were treated lovingly by the extremely talented Pixar peeps. The animation, however, was where my awe halted (screechingly).

The heavily accented French was quiet and hard to follow (even for adults used to reading subtitles). The rats were cute, or gross, depending on whom you ask, but the story quickly flopped from that of the rodents’ to that of a couple humans who, frankly, I could not make myself give a figue about.

I found Ratatouille to be a snoozer.

And wholly unworthy of its G rating. Older kids, if they’re able to stay awake through Ratatouille, might get something out of it. But the younger ones? Forget it.

There are guns. There are knives. There are full make-out scenes. There is blatant drunkenness. Despite all this debauchery, however, the movie manages to drag like a tassel of tin cans tied to the back of a honeymooner’s car.

With the garbled dialogue and message-heavy script, you’ll likely end up giving a play-by-play to your littles (like my husband had to for me). And that’s not a relaxing or rewarding movie experience for anyone.

Do your family a favor and skip this bloated, jumble of an animated film. Watch “The Incredibles” again instead, or go back to old school and indulge in some “Toy Story” or “Lion King.”